Ashes

Do you know what Tender Curiosity is ?
I guess Fitzgerald meant that everyone is so charming
From afar, naturally
The inevitable bloom of a lover's flaws has
A tendency of slapping a fool
In the face
I'm quite accustomed to
My sentimental swings at this point, that I know
This violent phase,
Too, shall pass
Disillusionment emerges from the wreckage
Like the strings of light from the dead skin of a storm.



I guess if I wanted to break it down to you, it would be like this
If you were the half-full glass
They turned into a cliche
I would take a few sips, before
Spilling you all over, at the hottest hour of the day



If you were the still water that they say runs deep
I'd dip my toes just to tease the crawlers
Before delving right in
I never learnt how to swim, though I tried
I'd sink like a ship with a broken keel
But did you know ?
The worst part of drowning is that it
Burns, and I
Carry ashes in my chest for
All the charred sentiments I kept burning
Throughout my life.

With time I've learnt to be as obtrusive as a summer cloud, scattering strings of qualm
Despite being blank
Walking in and out of lives like I tiptoe on shreds of glass
An apparition
With an opaque shadow
Someone passed through here, they made little difference
While they stained
Everywhere

Letter To The Crab II

A disquieting affair,
Having to stumble upon your double
Walking in broad day light, with such bravado
Though one cannot confuse us in human form
Our shadows get jumbled in the haze of dusk
Two mirrors on opposite walls
Infinite reflections, cracks that manifest in perfect sync
The echoes of my thoughts reflect off your skin
As polished as your ways of changing the flow
And it sorta glows in the dark
How dare you appropriate my existence so casually ?
No wonder Yakov has gone mad


I long gave up trying to poke holes in
Someone else's convictions
Not that I built mine on solid soils, I
See that in your case it's rather the lack of any, though
A blank canvas, terrifying as the death of an idea
Slithering behind whims you could never master
Picking a job that would kill you faster
You are trying to fast forward through the sluggish
Intro, skipping towards the light at the
End of the tunnel, aren't you ?
Just to see what's waiting beyond

Can't say it's the worst plan.


The world must look so amusing to you from afar
Always watching, never taking part
Drifting along, no creed, no woes, no grudges,
No enemies, no friends
No impressions of the world
No rhyme, no reason
No bonds that last longer than a season
Living in an abundance of time and carelessness
Jack of all trades except for candor

Hey,
What are you running away from ?

Letter To The Crab

I get fritty when I set next to you
Proximity wakes up my little goosebumps the way
One's closing index agitates the tip of their nose
A mixture of anticipation and ire
It's better than sitting opposite of you
Since I could talk for hours without having to
Look you in the face, truth is
I've been avoiding your gaze for the longest while
But it feels like your non obtrusive peers of curiosity though
So benign, still pierce
Into my side and I get conscious of my own voice
That I forget to align the words
I could tell no lies, even when I intend to whip the truth
So beautifully on the crust of affectation
I used to do this when I was bored but I
Never thought that I would swallow a dose
Of my own medicine, served so abstracted of ulterior motives

I've never noticed a disruption in your rhythm when I flung
My stones of curiosity, white noise buzzes in my head
As I try to guard up my kingdom against yours
In time I realized it's because you were hiding in plain sight
When I've been running away, all my life
Until I hit the mute wall of realization; as if
It sprung out of echoes and not bricks
Life is brief, full of flickering embers of
Laughter and sorrow, evasive
Like smoke
Colorful smoke ejected from all the planes
Dancing grandiosely along the coast line on Martyr's Day
Smoke and anarchy and
Disenchantment.

Your silence is as loud as the yellow of the sun and you
Don't seem to mind being misunderstood for lack of an explanation 
It's such a drag isn't ? being demanded to unbolt the doors
When you don't intend to leave your skin
I've read a lot about your kind, men that bask in a solemnity
Of sorts, they never lower their buckets
Into the well in which they drown their impressions
Of the world
And it is quite unsettling, when you giggle in a summoned
Earnestness and it sounds like the flaps
Of a restless dove in the heat of siesta
I know that you are hiding all the cynicism of
Your past life that yet dwells in the crevices of your
Laughter lines
I don't remember who told me that
But those that laugh more than they speak
Often have so much to cry about.