"The bird fights its way out of the egg. The egg is the world. Who would be born must first destroy a world."
-Hermann Hesse
When a world falls apart, the black sky that
Lies beyond is an abyss
Staring intently into your soul
My world was destroyed by the flood
All of the sudden, every thing I used to
Believe in shattered into a thousand pieces
Sparkling in the void of my being
I'm exaggerating
In many ways, but in this moment I am Ultra and my
Metaphors shall bloom like dead stars.
It's hard to believe in the value of things when
You get stripped of the right to trust in permanence
Nothing stays the same
People come and go, and death does not negotiate, when it's time
Basic facts but they are the mean kind,
Slapping one into remembrance
At random hours of the day,
As you step on dried up leaves and muse
On the sounds that seem too real
I may not be alone in this fray, many a young
Soul might be wallowing in the gust of derealization
But I wonder if it's okay, no one seems to notice how lost we are
How does it feel on the other side of consciousness?
This state of limbo has gone too long
And it makes me
Unresponsive to the pokes of foreboding
Indeed, at times I feel everything
And at times I am numb, so much that I perceive the world as if I'm trapped
In a chasm between shadow and light
My whole world was destroyed by the flood and none
Of the things I thought were reliable constants in
This reaction of propagating chaos remained as such
At times I remember as if I came out of a dream that this
State of stillness, though it feels as safe as my mother's lap,
Cannot go on because that's the law of the universe
But I wish
I wish with all my heart that I never come to
It's nice not to feel much for a change when You've felt enough
For a life time
I may love you infinitely
But only for this moment and I know how naive it sounds
In the great scheme of things but we are going to die anyway
And there is no point squeezing my heart dry, it's not going to change the fact that
This can never last because we are perishing ever so minutely even as I speak
I know that sometimes I make no sense for all my brains and
Sometimes I wish I could keep on silent because I'm never certain
If my heart is well explained, or it's just that
My infrequent rhapsodies are pitied the way you'd dote on a premature newborn
But I can't help it
You nod all the same with that signature smirk of the eyes
You get it, although you don't,
And I love you for that.
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